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20 Kid-Friendly Jokes for the New School Year

Lighten up the mood in the classroom with some funny kid-friendly jokes.  They are slightly corny, but definitely designed to make your students chuckle.  Share your favorite kid-friendly jokes below!



Q:  Where do polar bears vote?

A:  The North Pole


Q:  Why couldn’t the pirate play cards?

A:  Because he was always on the deck.


Q:  What has four wheels and flies?

A:  A trash truck


Q:  What do you give to a sick lemon?

A:  Lemon aid


Q:  What’s a tornado’s favorite game to play?

A:  Twister


Q:  What do you get when you throw a lot of books in the ocean?

A:  A title wave


Q:  Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up?

A:  Because it was two-tired


Q:  What did the mouse say to the other mouse when it tried to steal the cheese?

A:  That’s Nacho Cheese!


Q:  What’s a ghost’s favorite fruit?

A:  Boo-berries


Q:  Why did the man take his clock to the vet?

A:  Because it had ticks


Q:  Which is faster – heat or cold?

A:  Heat, because you can catch a cold


Q:  What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?

A:  A stick


Q:  Why was the math book always worried?

A:  Because it had so many problems


Q:  Why did the robber take a shower?

A:  So it would be a clean getaway


Q:  Why did the chicken go to jail?

A:  Because he was using fowl language


Q:  What has two legs but can’t walk?

A:  A pair of pants


Q:  Which school supply is king of the classroom?

A:  A ruler


Q:  Which vegetable should you never invite on a boat trip?

A:  A leek


Q:  How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity?

A:  Shocked


Q:  Why did the horse chew with his mouth open?

A:  Because he had bad stable manners

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It's been so long that I don't remember where this corny joke came from... What is the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, " Spit out your gum." The train says, " Chew, Chew, Chew!"

Lori Nodine
Lori Nodine

Really cute jokes. I think the kids would find them funny.